Oscar Fashions.

I like what I like. Simple as that.

Sure there was not a lot of colour on the red carpet on Sunday but perhaps that was a good thing (I mean poor Natalie Portman and her rather odd orange skin with a bright pink dress on a red carpet. She was a walking head ache with far too much make up - far too pretty a girl to be wearing so much make up) considering that when people do try it, they usually fail.

Here is my selection of the worst dressed. click to embiggen














Why is Heidi Klum (left) even there? Not only does her dress look like origami done by someone with no limbs, but her make up, hair and jewelry just scream 80's German lipstick lesbian.
And what the hell happened to Reese Witherspoon. That dress is like the brighter, uglier step-sister to Kate Winslet's dress.














Beyonce - When I was little me and a friend used to make dresses for Barbie (I know GAY) out of carpet samples. If only I had had a gold pen.
Who is this next woman? Jennifer Biel or some nonsense apparently. Looks like one of her implants has deflated then given birth to a saggier implant.


Now onto Best Dressed: (click to embiggen)














Halle Berry simply looked stunning. I mean she is impossibly beautiful anyway, but that black and gold dress (take note Beyonce) was stunning on her.
Some people thought Penelope Cruz looked too bridal. Whatever! She look absolutely stunning. How many more times will I use the word stunning you ask? Many, many more times. (tis late, am tired)














Wow did Taraji P Henson pull out all the stops. The dress looked like a opening flower and her necklace was just amazing. Stunning woman.
and my dear Meryl. She usually gets it wrong, but this was a classy ensemble. Everything was age appropriate.














I really do love Jennifer Aniston. She just looks like she would be a lot of fun. She leaves her usual black dress at home and goes for gold and cream and look divine.
My friend Jonathan said Marisa Tomei's dress looked like napkins. I thought it was stunning and different and she work the sh*t out of it.














My friend Dean thought Anne Hathaway was wearing a shovel. I thought the dress was stunning. The scales, the diamonds, the fact that she looks just so old style Hollywood. Stunning.
Viola Davis has worked the red carpets like a pro. She looks amazing every time we see her, and although gold was a brave choice for the Oscars, she pulled it off. Stunning.

This was brought to you by the word 'stunning' and the number 3.